Saturday, March 28, 2009 @ 11:58 PM
I can't read your pokerface;
There's a sudden surge of sorrow in me. Probably because i just read zijia's email.
I think he's really strong in his mentality wise. He's so brave to be able to accept things and adapt himself to fit into the situation given to him. I really look up to him for his mental strength.
I suddenly realised that im really weak compared to me. I cried real hard when i couldnt get my post , cried real hard when i lost my critical match , cried real hard when things werent going the way i wanted them to be. Why all the tears? Because im just not strong enough. Everytime unhappy stuffs happened to me , i will always want to give up. For the past 16 years , i had always been doing that. Escaping and looking for an easy way out.
It's really time for me to grow up , get out of my comfort zone and learn to be a stronger person.
***
I like it when i listen to my favourite itunes playlist at night. The songs sort of cool me down everyday. And today , the feeling is more intense than normal.
I have this thinking for a couple of weeks already. Where is the kind of quiet life that i want? Everyday is passed quietly and peacefully , just like how i like it to be. Grades dont matter anymore , achievements dont matter anymore. No disturbance , just silence. How i wish ...
It's just good to be a normal person. (普通人)
***
j.
